Trip Four - Part II - Family Introductions

By the time we rolled into Orange it was almost noon and the weather was gorgeous. There was still a chill in the air but the sunshine warmed us as we sipped tea outside at a cute cafe across from Paul's old office. As we walked back to the car we passed a men's clothing shop and peered in. The owner was glad to see us, "Hi Paul, how are you?" That small town familiarity made me smile. We then wandered further down the street to the local outdoor store where we purchased a gift for Paul's brother's birthday. Next on the agenda was finding a place to stay for the night. There was a rugby union event in town that weekend so hotel rooms were hard to come by. We tried at the golf club but the attendent, a young man with a funky style, gorgeous curls and a significant space between his front teeth informed us that they were indeed full, so we took a room at the motel just off the main drag. It was quite empty except for a handful trucks left for the day by migrant mine workers. The room was small and cold but just what we needed for the night. After getting settled we headed over to Paul's mum's nursing home. She is a lovely sweet lady and was so happy to see her son, although her Alzheimers made the visit awkward at times. "You're all grown up!" she said a couple of times and at one point she got talking about a donkey or some such thing. It was hard for Paul to see her in that state, supposedly she has deteriorated a lot in the last year, and it was likewise hard for her to let us go. She must be somewhat lonely even though family members seem to visit her often. It was so wonderful to watch as she and Paul joked together, now I know where he gets his sense of humor! On the way back we grabbed a bite to eat at the local RSL club. The woman behind the counter asked Paul how is mother is doing. He said he didn't know her, must have recognized his name, but I suspect many more people in Orange know of Paul than he of them. I was often reminded of his former heartthrob status in his younger years. After a quick nap we got dressed up for the party and stopped by Paul's father's house on the way. The house was a feast for the eyes. Every inch of every wall was covered with art, masks, clocks, and various nicknacks. He is a collector of many things, and has redone every window in stained glass. I now understand why Paul is such a minimalist in terms of decor!! His father's health has also declined a lot in the last year, and he seemed eager to reach out to Paul. Perhaps because he's had a falling out with his other son. He even gave him a family heirloom, some kind of certificate his grandfather had won playing cards. Lou and his wife Joan offered us gorgonzola, ham, crackers, olives, and drinks but we took just enough not to offend and agreed to return for breakfast in the morning as we headed out to the party.

Trip Four - Part One - Feeling David Lynch

Just as I was recovering from jetlag, Paul and I commenced a journey up to country New South Wales for a family visit in time for Paul's brother's 50th birthday party. The trip to Orange is about a 9 hour drive and as we left Melbourne in the afternoon, we stopped for the night just a hour or two outside of Orange in a town called Cowra. Cowra is famous for being the location of a Japanese POW camp in WWII, and now boasts beautiful Japanese Gardens and a World Peace Bell. We arrived late, found a hotel which strangely had the outdoor pool going even though it was definitely below freezing - this is the coldest part of Australia - and wandered down the street in search of dinner. The only place open at that hour was the bistro attached to the pub, so we gladly filled ourselves there. The menu was large but the only item not covered in a gravy or heavy sauce was pizza! Paul said, "Welcome to the country!" As I looked around at the nearby tables I noticed most plates consisted of some animal substance on top of fries, doused in a yellowish gravy. I asked for potatoes instead and received what I'm sure was made from a powdered mix. The food sat heavy in our stomachs but we were appreciative to be fed warm food. As we were finishing, a skinny man in a too tight gray suit, with large pertruding nose hairs and an overly friendly grin that exposed tobacco stained teeth, appeared at our table with a round tin tray. He seemed out of place amongst the casual beer-drinking locals. He asked if we liked the band, which we could barely hear in the distance but from afar sounded awful. At first we thought he was seeking donations for the musicians but soon realized he was the owner of the place helping to clear our dishes. He invited us to come over to watch the band and with nothing else to do, we complied. As we walked through the swinging doors to the bar, we noticed an odd assortment of locals scattered about the tables. The music was coming from the next room further on, so we continued on through the crowd. When we turned the corner, we got the first glimpse of the band, two men, one of which was quite short and tubby with very long hair, playing enthusiastically from a small stage to a crowd of zero. Yep, we were the only ones there. We laughed at the ridiculousness of it all but picked up some pool cues and began a game at the nearby table while the band played in front of us. They actually weren't bad once we got close. The mix of music was bizarre, from Def Leapord to Kenny Rogers to Frank Sinatra!! I clapped loudly after each song as there was no one else to do so, but I couldn't help but giggle each time. With all the strange characters we thought we were in a David Lynch film! The situation was just odd enough that I played my best game of pool ever and beat Paul twice (absolutely unheard of). Eventually the band stopped playing, and sat down for a beer next to the bar, so we headed out into the icey cold night, back to our hotel where we cuddled up under electric blankets. Australian buildings are just not equipped for the winter, very inefficient, so I'm always freezing! Quite often bathrooms have windows that dont shut, just slits to the outside, and no heat! We never watch TV at home but for some reason Paul flicked the switch as we tried to get comfortable in what seemed like a tiny bed. We watched some French film which was basically sex with little dialogue until that got boring, then a bit of Scary Movie 4, before finally giving up and going to sleep. The next morning we woke to a thick layer of frost on the car, as we headed out for a country breakfast on our way to the Japanese Gardens. The gardens were beautiful and we had a peaceful morning stroll,. What a wonderful way to start the day! It was so quiet and uplifting and getting a little fresh air and sunshine was great after spending so much time in the car. We also rang the World Peace Bell before leaving for the last stretch to Orange.

Trip 3 - What was before...

The first few days after my whirlwind trip to the US were a bit of a blur. Jetlag meant I slept more during the day than at night, so it was challenging to focus on work. Paul invited me to accompany him on a day trip to see a client in Ballarat, a small city about an hour and a half drive away. Ballarat is an old gold mining town famous for a worker rebellion that they say birthed democracy in Australia. We arrived in the afternoon and although we chatted with the staff at the museum, decided to skip the entry fee and have a hot chocolate in the quaint town instead. We cuddled up by the fire and sipped the chocolately goodness (it was very cold!) then wandered into the gold shop down the street. The friendly staff taught us about the history of gold mining in the area, about valuation of gold nuggets, and about the craft of making them into jewelry. They had some beautiful pieces which where fun to try on. Afterward we headed up to the nearby Wendouree Lake and were agast when we realized the lake no longer exists. Barren docks stuck out over dusty soil, and towards the center of what used to be a lake were mudflats, the setting sun reflecting in the puddles. Locals explained that the drought completely erradicated the lake but recent rains have created the muddy mess it is now. The site was shocking. We then headed off to meet with Paul's clients then made our way home in the dark, agreeing that we would return again sometime when we had more time to explore.

Trip Two - Growth

I couldn't make a trip to the US without driving over to E Wa to visit my neice and my friends at Sravasti Abbey. The two were opposites, my neice in the height of pubescent self-centeredness only talks about boys, and how hot she thinks she is (aye yie yie!). It was good to connect with her, and my sister who accompanied me on the drive, although it was strange to see how's she's grown into a woman's body while I've been away. Connecting with my spiritual community was as important. They abbey has grown as well, not so much in buildings but in persons. Since I've been away, one of my friends ordained, and another is set to in Sept, and two others have become residents. I've chosen a different path in life but I admire their work and wish them all the best. It's amazing how just being in a holy place like that calms the mind. All the mental garbage falls away and priorites seem clear. I think very fondly of the times I've spent at the abbey, while there I feel I'm a purer version of myself and so dropping in for a visit or going on retreat is like taking a necessary Dharma shower. I hope to sometime soon have a longer visit, but however short, I am happy I had the opportunity to stop by. I even arrived just before Venerable Chodron was about to give a teaching to a group of young people there for a young adults retreat, so I got some teaching and meditation time as well. The younguns were amazing people from the short discussions I had! Best of luck to you all!

Trip One - Ode to Jen

I popped into Seattle for a few days (sorry to those of you I didn't have time to to see!) to connect with family and attend Jen and Andy's wedding...although I was hoping for some warm sunshine to contrast the Melbourne Winter, my lungs graciously soaked in green tree fed air, and my skin soaked in the wet....Jen sat next to me in 7th grade history and English class wearing a "tilter" haircut, a gray penguin sweater and wristfuls of Swatches purchased on family trips to Europe. We were both somewhat introverted back then, and were happy to have a friend. She was a voracious reader and I remember admiring her ability to draw horses as we both doodled on our notebooks. We went skiing every weekend in winter months and played tennis together badly. Her family generously took me along on trips to the San Juans and Montana and as we grew, Jen and I shared in teenage rebellious behavior. At age 13 we bought pointy Fluvog Shoes, recycled clothes from Valu Village (Jen even had a cape!) and hair extensions and went to see bands like Echo and the Bunnymen. Later we'd drive around in a car we called the "Zitmobile", play chess in Volunteer Park and wander through the Seattle Art Museum, or sit down on the waterfront eating French bread with unsalted butter and cheese(we thought we were so cool), or sip coffees a the Last Exit on Brooklyn where we'd get in philosophical discussions with random strangers while eating the best PB&Js. Her creativity blossomed as she made costumes for theatre and I remember her always painting murals in her room, redesigning furniture and the like, but she also loved history and economics and science. She was always a bit clumbsy but somehow it worked for her. She made a friend when she ran into school late, knocking over a blind woman and breaking her cane. As I recall the woman said, "that's okay it happens all the time." After high school graduation we hopped on a plane to New York City. We laughed and laughed after I lectured Jen on being careful of theft in NYC then proceded to leave my wallet in the first cab we took. The first night I emerged from the bathroom to find Jen with childrens scissors in one hand and her long red hair in the other, chopping away just below her ear. "It's time for a change," she said. I was horrified when she asked, "Can you even it out?" We wandered around the city hopping between museums. At one stage it started to rain and everyone pulled out umbrellas or ran inside and under cover. Being proud Seattleites, we continued to walk down the street. Soon the light rain turned to a downpour and we were soaked. Shortly afterwards the sun peeped through the clouds and the rain stopped. Everyone then flowed back out onto the street dry and comfortable while Jen and I stood there looking like drowned rats. After some days exploring the city we headed out to Connecticut where I met up with another friend whose family has a house on the beach. I remember have discussions about how we'd raise our kids as we walked along the beach road. From there we went our separate ways, Jen down to Virginia and me upstate to visit my father and soon after we drifted even further apart for a few years as she went off to Montana and then to Scotland, and got into rowing and studying econ and history, while I studied art, chased bands around, and became an environmental activist, but towards the end of Uni we met up again. I bumped into her in the HUB on the UW campus and learned she'd just returned from living in Scotland. She tripped up the stairs and spilled soup all over the cafeteria floor and I laughed that she hadn't changed. We ended up living together for about a year, just off Broadway during a fun time in Seattle. We were in our early 20s and spent our time going out to bars, seeing bands, working hard at low-paying jobs, and eating breakfasts at local cafes. One particular weekend morning after an eventful Presidents show at the Croc, we bumped into some other women friends at Septieme and sat eating drinking and chatting for hours. That day The Breakfast Club was born. The four of us (Page, Jen, Millie, and I) had breakfast every weekend for years, even though each of us left for periods of time to live abroad and returned. Eventually we started vacationing together once a year since distance made breakfast impossible. We took backcountry ski holidays, toured DC, relaxed at a farm in Virginia, took a couple trips to Idaho and one to Jen's parent's island cabin and fantasized about vacationing in the Mediterranean some day, but that too faded as we began to work busy jobs, buy houses, find partners, and have kids. It was a great joy to be reunited again to witness Jen and Andy's union and to support them in starting a family, due soon! Here's to you Jen! Thanks for all the memories!